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Articles >> Culture & Society articles > Jealousy


Jealousy is certainly a habit that is harmful to yourself and your relationship. There is no doubt that jealousy causes distance and mistrust between two people. Jealousy is the little green monster and it is an uncomfortable feeling either way.
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Source:  Amber Saleem
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  • Have you ever had a bad habit, feel not good on that? Perhaps it was teeth grinding, nails biting, nose picking or interrupting others when they speak. You might try to overcome them because doing this is unpleasant, annoying or even harmful.

  • Jealousy is certainly a habit that is harmful to yourself and your relationship. There is no doubt that jealousy causes distance and mistrust between two people. Jealousy is the little green monster and it is an uncomfortable feeling either way.

  • But question is this why do we jealous? Why do we get anger at the thought of someone else having something we want? Why do we always personalize things and deem them our own? Why we compare our self with others?

  • Jealousy can be hard to identify. But guaranteed it will bring you unsetting feelings in the pit of your stomach. Jealousy is also sickness of the ego. Means your are not getting what you want, but some one else is. Means it is a time to look at the crux of the situation and find out why you care so much that the other person is doing well.

  • Some people may only be jealous of one specific thing (wealth, intelligence, physical attraction etc). Some will be jealous of everyone who makes them feel threatened in any area. There are people who will dislike some people because they are slender, others because they are intelligent and even some who have reputation for being nice person. Jealousy can come from insecurity and feeling threatened, it can also come from an inflated ego that always needs to be number 1.

  • Remember, good thoughts, good actions, precede good fortune. If I think ill will toward another human being. Only ill will shall be returned. So it is better to wish some one well in their fortune and to re-center and focus on what it is that you really want.

  • If we jealous that shows our ugly side, that we are vulnerable and weak. We don’t want to be jealous. When we are jealous it’s a fear in us that the other may be interested in someone else, it brings out our insecurities. We shouldn’t be jealous but as human its one of our derelict that we have in us. We have just got to learn to control our jealousy, for we don’t want the one we loves to see that ugly side of us.

  • Its all around us, we can not escape it and we cannot deny it. Express Amna her feelings. When I feel jealousy it takes a bit to recognize that it is there. I first get that uncomfortable feeling welling up inside by good fortune, I recognize it. Then I can analyze what exactly it is I am jealous of. I can pinpoint what it is that I am not getting that I desire. And then I can step back and wish the person well and focus on my desire to come to fruition. There is more than enough in the world that we can both get what it is that we are looking for.

  • How to Control Jealousy?

  • People who suffer from jealousy need to ask themselves if they want to live their lives not liking perfectly nice people. They need to realize that life is too short, and it makes no sense to fill our heads with nastiness.

  • The first step in conquering jealousy is identifying its source. When do I get jealous? Is it when my friend takes interest and praise some other girl/boy? When some one looks beautiful? My friend has a pet which I like but I can’t afford that. Understand what you are feeling. Jealousy can spark emotions such as fear or anger. Know what’s causing you to feel the way you do.

  • To banish jealousy you have to build yourself up to the point you don’t feel lesser. Stop comparing yourself to others and embrace your uniqueness. Be authentic in your feelings, your thoughts and who you are. In your surroundings there will always be someone beautiful, slim, someone with a batter home. Don’t waste your time with such thoughts. Create your own life with authenticity of who you are and get away from the comparison.

  • Build yourself up by having your own interests. Count your blessings instead of thinking about what you don’t have. Acknowledge your accomplishments. If you don’t like something about yourself, take action to improvements. 

  • You must believe on yourself and know that you are a good person. You are special, unique in your own way. In other words, there is no one like you. Be confident and know your capabilities, it makes you feel better about yourself.

  • Love and respect yourself. Insecurity breeds jealousy. When you don’t feel good about you, it’s hard to believe that someone else could.

  • Boost your self esteem. Jealousy in most cases is the result of low self esteem. You can boost your self esteem to overcome jealousy. Get involve in sports, do gardening, engage yourself in crafts making, etc. whatever helps you feel better about yourself is what you want to do.

  • With some source of jealousy, the fact that anyone could have the positive thing if they were willing to work hard enough to get it. The kid in school who gets “A” grades usually takes the work seriously and pays attention in class. The person with a slim figure usually watches his diet and exercises.

  • Remember also that the person you may be jealous of is probably not as happy, successful, healthy, or whatever you think they may be. And the person with more money is not necessarily a successful person, just because of their wealth. Success is defined by healthy relationship with yourself, your family, friends, and pets and so on.

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