Loving and

caring for someone is not difficult but keeping a relationship healthy is a two

way effort. KP! takes a look...

The first

question that crosses the mind whenever one has a fight with his/her partner

is, ‘Am I happy in my relationship?’ We all want to make our relationships work

so we can achieve happiness together for the rest of our lives. But how can one

improve a relationship? Being loving and caring about someone is not difficult

but keeping a relationship healthy is a two way effort. The couple in a

relationship becomes a ‘we’ and is connected to each other in a strong bond.

Unfortunately, relationships break down around us all the time, due to

misunderstandings that are caused. Most people go through life without

understanding the key essentials that can make or break their relationship and

how they can keep the baggage of bitterness out of their relationship. Read on

to find out ways that can help you strengthen your relationship.

Communication

The most

important aspect of a successful relationship is proper communication. In a

good relationship you and your partner should never feel uncomfortable talking

about anything. If you have argued over something, never go to sleep at night

without asking the other’s forgiveness. Also, many couples who argue have the

fear that their relationship is a mistake or a potential future disaster. Many

relationship psychologists have revealed that couples with a healthy level of

understanding identify and discuss the issues whereas couples who are unhappy

simply run away from their problems. By talking things out one can transform

one’s relationship into something special; a bond that is on a higher level.

Allow your partner to realise that you are an individual and should be treated

as an individual and offer your partner with the same respect.

Mutual Respect

Accept and

respect the likes and dislikes of your partner, and your partner should do the

same for you. Each person is allowed to have their own opinion, listen to what

the other person is saying and if you disagree, talk about it. Think about

giving your partner room to grow as an individual and do the same for yourself as

well. By giving them space to grow will add strength to your relationship.

Relationships are always based on the 50-50 rule. Do not be eager to have your

own way if you want to have a long and happy relationship. Make it your goal to

give in more than 50% of the time, and take pleasure in letting your partner

have his/her way as often as you can. Very closely listen to your partner

whenever he/she starts telling you where you are going wrong. Share ideas and

decisions regarding how your time and money will be spent, how finances should

be managed and how various circumstances should be dealt with. Never assume

that you know your partner’s thoughts, feelings, or desires. Do not assume your

partner understands you either. Always bring things out so there are no

misunderstandings and encourage your partner to do the same.

Being Positive

Never focus on each

other’s negativities. Always emphasise the positives and force yourself to

reflect upon them frequently. Avoid saying anything negative or critical about

your partner in public, even to your best friends. You might be strongly

tempted to do this, but it only devalues your relationship more and can make

the situation worse as it always creates misunderstandings. Maintain the

relationship in every way possible and never ever compare your relationship to

others. Not your parent’s, not your friend’s, not your coworker’s, not that

couple’s relationship that seems perfect all the time, because that will not

help even a bit but instead will create a mess. To make your relationship the

healthiest and the best, you both have to participate actively in keeping it

positive. Individual tastes and preferences are in every one of us, no two

people like the same things all the time. Your love and commitment to each

other should grow over the years. The longer you have been married, the more

history you have together. The triumphs and disappointments, the successes and

the failures, all are part of sharing a life together. And that history is

unique to you and no one else has that or can duplicate it.

Strength Of Love

Last but not

least, love each other every day. Express your love often and in different

ways. Do things to keep your love and romance alive; never stop treating each

other like sweethearts. Talk to each other and do various things together. Do

not let external values affect the internal feelings of your heart and do all

that can be done to make you both happy. Every decision made should be for the

best of your relationship. Keep telling your partner how much you care about

him/her. Do it even though you know that he/she knows. Most importantly, never

take love for granted. Keep in mind that after your parents and children are

gone, your partner is the only person who will stay with you for the rest of

your life.

To stay

together ‘no matter what’, stick in there and make things works as there is no

question of separation!